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Maturing 101

I never really give my piece’s titles before writing them, I feel it stunts my wiggle room in what I can and cannot talk about. This topic though, deserves the recognition. 

When I was younger I was unaware of how hard you really have to work to get what you want and most importantly need. I won’t lie and say there weren’t a couple of times I almost failed my grade and might have had to repeat. That was always my worst fear, repeating a grade. My reasoning had nothing to do with doing the work over, but more so of what people would think of me “why is she getting held back, is she remedial?” I’ve always tried to be harder on myself so when people do it wouldn’t hurt as bad, but ironically it still hurts (chuckles). Every time I was on the verge of failing I would tell my mother “don’t worry about it, I got this” and every time either she would save me or the very rare occasions I would save myself. Every time telling her and my teachers, “this won’t happen again” or “this is the last time”, I promised. That’s probably one of the main reasons why I don’t trust people when they make promises to me, the reason being I broke so many promises to my teachers and most importantly my mother. My sincerest apologies for letting you down, but thank you for believing in me when I had no Idea how I was going to pass your class. Thank you mommy for knowing when I’m lying when I’m too scared to tell the truth, thank you especially for believing me when I didn’t even believe in myself. 

I was browsing the internet one day and I came across the article “How Long Does it Actually Take to Form a New Habit? (Backed by Science)”, written by James Clear. In the article he describes how psychology researcher, Phillippa Lally did a study on the average length of time it takes to form a new habit. She said “On average, it takes more than two months before a new behavior becomes automatic — 66 days to be exact.” (JC) I had an epiphany and thought maybe that’s why I always almost (keyword, almost) failed. I would start off the semester good then I would slowly but surely stop doing my work, stop handing it in and since I was accustomed to turning in my work late, I knew I would be able to do it again and again and again. My brain programed to do this overtime and I just now realized it. I was disappointed with myself because I had potential to get A’s but I settled for B’s C’s and that’s where I messed up, I became a settler. (fyi: you should never settle, you deserve more, always. By more I mean better) You could imagine how I felt. 

As I got older I started to realize that in real life you cannot get what you want, you have consequences and some of them neither your teachers nor your mother can save you from. Contrary, I am use to getting whatever I want, when I want it. Until today I realized that was one of the most childish ways of thinking. If I believe I can get whatever I want without working for it, life has another thing coming. 

I’m nineteen and I turn twenty next month, most of you are around my age, if not significantly older. My advice to you that a wise man and my mother tell me all the time “time waits for no one, what you can put off until tomorrow, do today” 

Maturing involves making sacrifices, not only for others but for yourself. Maturing involves securing yourself for the future, and your futures, future. Maturing involves, acting off of rationality instead of emotions. Maturing involves, knowing you might not have it now, but once you work for it and towards it, the end result will be success. 

There will always be a light at the end of the tunnel, you just have to work to get there and remember anything handed to you has no amount of satisfaction as something you work towards.

Are you on the path to maturing your life for the better? If not, today is a great day to start.

By Chloe Ridore