Behind The Screen

Behind The Screen

It’s safe to say that making connections with people have changed drastically from centuries ago to the present day.

Back then if someone liked you, they would write you a heartfelt letter, or if you were lucky and sparked the interest of a musician, they would compose music about the way you make them feel. Growing up in the 2000s and doing research on the 90s (which happens to be my favorite decade next to the 60s) I have realized technology has changed the overall view on interacting with people. Of course cell phones, the internet, and social media have just recently made their debut a little over the past twenty years, they have the most drastic impact on society. For the better? It depends on the individual.

Human interaction is a given you have to communicate with people. Some like it more than others, but it tends to get a little interesting when you involve feelings toward the person in the mix. When you see people in person, you can instantly like a person for who they are just because, I think that’s where “love at first sight” came from. You feel differently about people in person you can see all the imperfections that they would oblige if you met them online. After all that you still want to converse with them, get to know them and look past their beauty. I think that’s beautiful in itself.

On the other hand, meeting someone online has a different approach, you’re cutting out the part when the sparks fly. You’re basing your perception of the person on their looks, quite shallow, but that’s how it is. The good thing about meeting someone online is that you get to skip the awkwardness of getting rejected in person. Why? Because there're so many other people, you talk to if one declines you. You can also connect with more people who have the same views on life as do a lot faster and more efficiently. That too is beautiful because, like myself, a lot of people don’t like wasting time.

Ironically I used the internet and my cell phone to ask a series of people “would you rather meet someone online or in person. If so why?” a lot of people responded in person. The reason being is because “it feels more real and genuine, I can see her reactions” said one guy “I can see her blush, get shy just by what I’m saying.” Another guy said when we first meet “in person it just cuts out the nervous feeling beforehand, and it builds a stronger relationship for the long run.” He then continues to say it’s sad that “we base our connections on looks, opposed conversation especially when one is a lot deeper than the other.”  A few women chimed in as well one saying “I’d rather meet someone in person because you don’t get to make assumptions beforehand based on profiles etc.” Another woman said I’d totally rather meet someone “in person, the first impression is everything. Plus I don’t feel safe meeting anyone online, Catfish really threw it off for me.” For those who do not know Catfish is a television show on MTV documenting individuals who have been in a relationship with another person over social media site but have never met them in person. The two co-host Nev and Max video document the people and finally bring them to whoever they have been “dating”. Most times the individual behind the screen is not what or who they claim to be. The tv show sparked interest among young views and made them rethink online dating.

Although most people shy away from meeting online, a couple of people rather do so. One woman said, “I’d say online because it takes the anxiety away. But, I won’t discredit meeting in person because it allows clarity and an actual portrayal of real life social interactions.”  One man says, “I feel like online is better because you instantly get to know what the person is into.” He then goes on to say it “takes out the middle man so when you finally meet them it like you’ve known each other for years.” I won’t knock meeting online because I’ve met several people who have met online and were just as or if not stronger than people who’ve met in person. Two individuals have stayed mutual. One saying there is definitely “benefits from both sides.” While another says “in theory there’s a difference in the two ways of meeting someone but not really in practice.”

On the other hand, I have tried both. I met the first person I fell in love with on social media. It didn’t work out for various reasons. The main reason I used social media at was because I was young, and I wasn’t able to go outside unless it was to school or church (thanks, mommy). So I used social media as my interaction with people. I can say it’s a lot different from meeting people in person. I remember being so dependent on finding someone and so happy with how easy it was. Here I am a teenager, and I’m able to talk to as many people as I want when I want. It also helped a lot because I never really felt pretty so I would take pictures and edit them and make me look the way I wanted to look, and people loved it. I was reliant with the way people thought of me. I remember the first person I met in person and thought I was amazing it was last year when I came to New York. We dated for six months then went our separate ways. That helped me because I realized that I am beautiful, no matter what anyone say. After that, I vowed to meet people in person more than online. I went on dates and had fun the old fashion way I’ve recently met some cool cats just because we bumped into each other at the right time. I won’t tell you who to meet or how to meet them but just be safe and know your worth. Not everyone is perfect so don’t make people feel insecure. Get to know somebody new and don’t be afraid to step out your comfort zone. Who knows you might meet your true love in person, or behind the screen.

By Chloe Ridore

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