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MMA star Conor McGregor did not even last two rounds against Irish President Michael D. Higgins in a much anticipated fight last night. McGregor has already demanded a rematch.
It was billed as a titanic matchup between two of Ireland’s favourite sons: one, a controversial loudmouth that rubs shoulders with the Hollywood elite, the other, a softly-spoken poet with a love for big Swiss dogs.
McGregor went into the fight against Higgins as the overwhelming favourite, given his pedigree as a former world champion and the fact Ireland’s president is 82 years old.
On the line was the top job in Ireland. To the victor the spoils and the prize on offer was the presidency itself. After seeing McGregor’s obnoxious tweets about news back home, Higgins had quickly and surprisingly agreed to the unsanctioned bout.
McGregor started strongly, hitting the self-proclaimed 'Octogan-gerian' with two kicks and a couple of body blows. But that was to be the ‘notorious’ fighter’s last meaningful contribution the the fight.
Midway through the first round, Higgins got his bearings and hit McGregor with two lightning fast blows to the head, stunning the former champ. Dazed, McGregor was unable to stop the president from taking him to the canvas in an ankle lock.
Higgins had done his homework and inflicted punishment after punishment on the leg that McGregor broke two years ago. At the end of the first round, McGregor – bloodied and in shock – barely made it to his feet.
In the second, Higgins moved quick to end it, again taking McGregor down to the octagon floor and again concentrating his blows on his compatriot’s troubled leg.
Just as McGregor was looking to shake off the president and reassert himself in the contest, Higgins somersaulted over the former champ and put him into a rear naked chokehold. Unable to do anything about it, McGregor tapped and the ref put a stop to the fight.
Higgins was jubilant in victory, telling a dazed McGregor that he had “been in your wife’s DMs” ahead of the bout. "She loves my poems! See you next time, champ!"
Extra! Extra!
*Le Chou is intended for purely satirical and entertainment purposes and does not reflect the views of The Brussels Times*
